Back at my flat in George I was as busy as a bee, as the previous summer I was home, I had decided that this flat living is not for me, and after an outing to a place called Haarlem, a very traumatic experience with a friend of ours, Hannes, behind the wheel of my Uno that I used to drive, I was adamant that I wanted to become a homesteader.
Hannes is one of those people that knew only one way to drive any car, and that is to put his foot on the petrol, never to take it off again before he got to his destination!
As I was no feminist, and I could see that Hannes was not at all happy to be driven by a woman, and a granny at that, I told him that he could do the driving, and with Irma in the passenger seat, and the unsuspecting me cosily in the back, packed lunch, flask and all, we set off to have a look at what was for sale in Haarlem.
By the time we hit the Outeniqua pass I was already a nervous wreck, and when we took the steep parts without Hannes lifting his foot, or changed to a lower gear, and the poor little Uno started screaching like a big plane getting ready for take-off, I started hyperventilating! Badly!
It felt like ages before we left the pass behind us, and the Uno and self got our breathes back, the little car now hurtling like something demented across the straight and quite narrow road of the Small Karroo! When we stopped at a place called Knoll's Halt, I was a bally wreck, and my legs felt like two jelly sticks when I got out of the car to go to the toilets, and when I saw my white face with a blue tint around my mouth in the cracked mirror, I just knew that a heart attack was near! Luckily not, as I revived marvelously after fortifying myself with a packet of crisps to put the salt back, and a bottle of lichee flavoured water to wet my poor dry mouth.
I tried to tell our driver that the Uno might be small, but it still needed a gear change now and then, but I don't think he caught on that I was trying to give him a subtle hint, as we again screamed through the next pass, the little Uno like a beetle pushing a too big ball of dung, me a nervous wreck, Irma sitting with her neck as stiff and straight as a ramrod!
Coming from the main road and looking at Haarlem, I was hooked, as it lies between mountains and apple groves, and it was beautiful, until I saw the little village itself. Coming in to the village, a few dilapadated houses greeted us, and I think all three of us was a bit big eyed, as everywhere thin, underfed dogs were peeping with hungry eyes at us.
The only traffic we encountred on our way to the Lutheran Church where we were to meet the agent was one enormous bull lying smack in the middle of the main road, about seven cows around him, all taking a siesta under the scorching sun! No amount of tooting could move this lot, so Hannes edged the Uno, who I think was smaller than the bull, closer and closer, until he was next to the bull, then let rip with the hooter! Bull jumped up with a snort, kicking up a huge dust storm, and small pebbles flying all over, some hitting the car! He then started kicking up dust with his monstrous paws, snorting and shaking his big head ominously!
Hannes started revving up the Uno while he simultaneously let rip with the hooter again, and after some more snorting and kicking up dust the bull seemed to have had enough, and with a last redrimmed eye look of pure hatred at the Uno and its passengers he commanded his many wives to get up, and off he led them, straight into somebody's potato field. We came across a few more cattle families, but they were much more good natured than  'The Sheik of Haarlem' with his many wives!
The deeper into the village we drove, the better the houses appeared, and I think at some or other paint suppliers a huge mistake was made with the mixing, and then this flop was presented free to the people, because there was about ten houses painted in a bright magenta, bright enough to make one's eyes burn, and driving further in, we found also a group of houses painted in the limiest green I have ever seen. But in that village they looked lovely, if a bit conspicious!
We also met a herd of beautiful horses, and when a hasty donkey suddenly stepped into the road right into the way of the roaring Uno, I had to give a bit of a snigger when Hannes had to put his foot hard on the breaks, as he just could not grasp that we were in a rural village with all kinds of hazards. A huge sow was also grazing away along the road, and it did put a bit of doubt in my mind, but I decided to see what the agent had to offer!