I don't know if the lot at the hotel were plain sadistic, but one night I was called to the phone by Joe, and he said he didn't know who it was! I still don't know whether the lot were plain sadistic, as it was Iain on the other side. My heart jolted like a bally run away colt, not from love or excitement, but from pure  terror, as I did not want to go anywhere ever again with this man, so I told a white lie, and said that I had to work on Tuesday, but will get another day off, this day still unknown to me, and will phone him the next night to say when, of course without the slightest intention to do so. My voice was hoarse from angst at the idea of climbing into that red revving thing on it's mag wheels again, and Iain must have took it for lust or passion, as his voice became soft and caressing., and I got SCARED!
Anna was furious at me for being such a snob, and talked and fought with me the whole night, so, after a lot of deformation of my character, being unable to sleep with her voice droning on and on about people who thought they were better than others, I capitulated, and said Yes, OK, I will go one more time.
So under Anna's watchful eyes I phoned the next day, but not able to face that red thing again, I made her promise that because she was so adamant on me going with this man, I could have the Panda for the day, and so I told him that I would go, but in our car, and he could do the driving. I also told him to park his car at the top part in the parking lot, as he would have a good run for making it start from there, self not feeling to do some pushing!
He had a full day  planned for us, starting with breakfast, then on to the Famous Grouse whisky distillarry, then to Crieff for lunch, and it sounded very interesting, and I was actually quite fine with it all! That is before I saw the CHAIN! Sitting in a small cafe in Comry waiting for our breakfast, a small ray of sunshine suddenly sneaked through the window, and it fell on Iains chest, and I now saw that his shirt was unbuttoned, with just the two bottom ones intact, and on his quite yummy chest lay a thick, shiny, lit up to bally eyeblinding magnificanse by the ray of sun, a thick, fake, golden chain! Started hyperventilating! Badly! He must have unbuttoned his shirt while we were sitting there, and I noticed it only when the chain got lit up!
When the breakfast came, I had no appetite, that goodlooking fare now tasting like sawdust! But I struggled through, and tried to convince myself that it wasn't so bad, and that I was mature enough to weather this storm also, but ready to murder Anna for coercing me into this dilemma !
So on we went to The Famous Grouse distillarry, me trying to not think about that open shirt, and neither looking at it! We were standing in the keeping room after Iain bought the tickets for our whisky tour, when I saw a German tourist, he and his companion the only other people at that stage, nudge his wife, and with his eyes, and a faint nod of his head, told her silently to look our way. They were looking so intently at Iain, that I also took a peep, and almost expired! The bally man's shirt was now completely unbuttoned, and the chain was sparkling and shining brightly in the electric lights! I was so shocked I wanted to vomit! The rest of the wait for our tour guide was pure hell, as every tourist who came in, sooner or later noticed the chain, and there was a lot of nodding and winking, and also a few sympathetic glances to my side!
I took heart at the thought that when the tourguide came, and we started on our excursion into the mysteries of whisky making, the attraction of the chain would wane, as there would be many other interesting things to see.
Our tourguide was a young and very pretty young lady, who competently jostled us into a nice line that could easily follow her through the narrow lanes, but she was quite jolted out of her composure when we came to rest in a chamber where the process started, and her eyes fell on the chain, and I am not sure, but I thought I heard a few giggles behind me. 'Oh, earth, please open up and swallow me', I prayed, but as nothing happened, we proceeded further into the depths of this wonderworld, of which I saw absolutely nothing. The young guide's attention was so undermined by us, as she kept on looking so much at Iain, then at me, a frown in her pretty eyes, that she got a bit confused, and more than once got all mixed up with he different processes! Thing is, I was very smartly dressed in my Prada pants and a natty little top from Marks and Spencer!
When we at long last came to the actual tasting of the whisky, I was ready to die, and swallowed every glass of whisky that was put in front of me in one gulp, not bothered at all with the different aromas and nonsense we had to try and detect. I got a few extra glasses, the girl realising I think, that I was trying to drown my shame and sorrow. To top it all, Iain was asking a lot of questions, and played along with finding tastes and aromas with vigour, the chain swaying gaily and brightly as he moved!
I had to lean heavily on my beau's arm to get to the car when at last we could escape, under a wide variety of stares, some disgusted, thinking me a drunk, while others, realising I think, my shame, gave me such sympathetic looks that I sommer cried!
Iain then wanted to treat me to lunch in Crieff, a very upmarket village, but even walking on a clowd of alcoholic stupor, I did not see myself sitting in a smart restaurant, having to watch Iain flaunt both his chain and his six pack! And to make matters worse, underneath that six pack, was a small rounded pot belly! So it being a nice and warm day, we bought some take-aways, and I had my always present flask of coffee, so we sat in the park and had our lunch. I took some photos, but asked him to take the chain off, as it was shining too much in the sun, my camera wouldn't focus, as darn it, my kids would have a fit if they saw it!
At last it was time to go back, and I couldn't wait to get rid of my gallant beau, as he was just that, very thoughtful of my needs, but the open shirt just did not do it for me. Before we got back to the hotel, another bally mishap occurred, but that can wait till tomorrow!