We had been paid our first wages, which I thought a shame, as it was quite a small wage for the amount of work we did. But of course, they thought, after Anna's pleading, that we were extremely hard-up, and on top of that we were South Africans, who were so poor that we would work for anything! But I had another well paid job to go to, so I decided to see a bit of Scotland first, and if I didn't like it, would go to Chipping, where I even had a car thrown in! The only trouble there is that it being the staff car, to be used for shopping, taking Benny out, or the dogs to the vet or doggy parlour, I couldn't stay over somewhere for the night.
Anyway, with our weekly wage burning in our pockets, we decided to have a good meal at a restaurant, and after first walking around to find the pub where we would spend the evening, we decided on a bistro right across the pub on a little road leading up to the Royal mile! We were ravenous, as we missed lunch, too much in a hurry to make ourselves something. The menu was not big, but being a bistro concentrating on fish, they used the catch of the day, and only the freshest veggies as the pretty young waitress informed us on coming through the door.
We gasped a bit like two fish out of the water on seeing the prices, but decided that it was worth it just to sit down to a lovely meal, and that meal being served to you!  We did not go for starters, so I ordered  crabcakes, and Anna some or other buttered fish, and, our tummies now gurgling like Vesuvious wanting to errupt, we sat waiting impatiently. When the food came, we looked at each other, Anna's black kohl lined eyes full of disgust, as on her plate was this tiniest of little fish, smothered in a kind of butterry sauce, and on my plate was two very small round balls, each on its own rocket leave, and a blob of orange marmelade on each side. So we sipped our wine slowly, waiting for the salads, breads, or whatever would be served with this dish that could be eaten in about four mouthfulls, and after waiting for ages we called the waitress to tell her that she had forgotten the rest of our meal. She told us, blushing a little, that if we wanted other stuff, we had to pay for it!
We were shattered, as this two tiny meals would cost about half of our weekly wage, and with faces drooping sadly, we started on the meal. I tried to locate just a pinhead of crab in my potato balls, but did not find any, and poor Anna needed only about a minute to finish her tiny fish!
And to top it all, the waitress, smiling angelically, asked us if we enjoyed our meal, and we gave her a piece of our minds and I asked her to tell the bally owner that I was still licking my teeth in case the only bit of crab got stuck between two of them, and maybe that is why I never found any in that tattie balls!!
We both had a steakpie, veggies an chips for a quarter of that excuse for a meal, at the pub where we intended to spend the rest of our precious evening-out. Afterwards we of course realised that as we were so close to the Royal mile, people catered mostly for unaware tourists with lots of money!
The live music was good, with the two guys, one on a guitar and another one on an accordian, very good, and the atmosphere lively ! It was a real touristy pub, and the two musicians were clad in kilts, and looked smart with their shiny black shoes and white socks, and each had a beautiful sporran to finish the look. The only fly in the ointment was the guitarist, a not so young wanna-be mohawk, looking strange in the kilt with all the hair on the sides of his head shorn of, and the bit left on the top running from front to bottom like a green coloured fan!
Anna was in seventh heaven, and when the guys stopped for a rest, she ambled up to them and started asking a lot of questions about their careers as musicians. She was genuinely interested, as she loved music, and my daughter Irma, who writes and tone-sets her own music, sang regularly in her restaurant. The accordian player was a bit of a show-off and enjoyed Anna's attention immensely, but the other one looked a bitty bored, and he looked so strange and out of place that I couldn't keep my eyes off him.
The owner of the B+B  had found out that there were busses running at two in the morning on different routes  for late revellers, so we could at least stay till Anna had enough enjoyment for the night. Not that I did not enjoy myself too!
The music stopped at twelve, and the two musicians joined us. The Mohawk was actually a very interesting guy, who had travelled the world playing his guitar, and we chatted away nicely, while Anna was casting her spell over the accordian player, who looked a bitty bemused by all this attention. When I told Anna that it was almost time to go, she threw me such a look of loathing that I blushed, and told me roundly that, old priz that I was, I could leave if I wanted to, but she was staying put. I tried to explain, I pleaded, I got cross, but Anna was in no mood to loose the fish she had caught, told the whole pub that she called me old Mother Superior because of my being such a wet stocking!
I was not going to miss that bus, as I had no wish to go home with the Mohawk, his four front teeth looking a bitty rotten to me, so I took my things, told a very angrily flushed Anna that I was going, and set out for the bus stop that was just around the corner. What happened at the pub I would never know, Anna as silent as the grave about it, but I wasn't at the bus stop long before I saw Anna come hurtling down the very steep road, swaying funnily every time she put a foot forward. She was quite intoxicated, and so was I, but not half as bad a my friend!

We were warned to keep ourselves ready for a busy night on Saturday, and I was glad that I did not go up in the mountain behind the hotel for a walk after the morning shift, as between helping with the washing up, doing the puds and running up and down to the pub with it, until Joe came in and told me that we now also had to take the puds to the diningroom, which was used for smart dining, and Angy, the waitress there would get it at the door, but we had to take our aprons off before going in. Thank heavens there was no more mishaps, but I was pooped, as now Alex started shouting for one of us to come into the kitchen and clean his pans, and of course Anna immediately became almost emmersed in the huge sink of soapy water, apparantly deaf to the world, so when Alex gave one blood curdling bellow to move our bloody asses, I left everything and made for the kitchen.
I then had a serious talk with Anna, who looked straight through me, and told her that she either had to do some of the puds, or clean the chef's utensils. She opted for the utensils, as she was still trying to get a very reluctant Alex to notice her interest in him, and of course had not built up the courage to use the microwave after my mishap! But Alex was one of the few men that took an instant dislike to her, why, I could not understand, and when she started calling him Bolla, a kind of name she used when trying to get into people's good books, he told her to shut up or leave the kitchen, or he would throw her out! Rosanne then called both of us to a talking-to, and said that while the rush is on, we do not say a word in the kitchen, and to keep the utensils clean at all times! I was actually surprised at Anna, as she had her own restaurant for years, and should have known about kitchen codes!
After work there was again a request for us to go into the pub, as there were still people who wanted to meet us. I tried to get out of it, but Joe, who called all women darling, told this darling that we did not have to stay long, but by now I knew that with the Scottish people who loved entertaining in the pub, we had no chance to get to bed before early morning, and I was pooped!
It turned out to be a fabulous evening, and after the second glass of red my sore feet felt as if they had gone away from my body, and when I found myself in the arms of one burly farmer also called Joe, dancing closely pressed to his big chest to the tune of 'That's Amorè' my tiredness evaporated like mist before the sun!
Anna had no interest in anyone but Alex, who she apparently saw as a new beau, as he would not leave after the week-end never to come back like the tourists, or just come now and then like the farmers and other people of the district! Poor Alex, who just wanted to play a few games of pool, was trying to dodge this attentions that was making him not only the envy of the other single men, but also the object of a lot of mirth from the village people.
I did not understand Anna, as I myself would never have gone for a man who wore a solid metal plate instead of a plate with teeth where he had lost his four front teeth, making him look like an inmate of dr. No, or anyway, one of James Bond's enemies when he smiled at other people or grimaced at us!
There were a lot of guests in the hotel that night, and we, heads throbbing and bodies aching, took ages to finish that Sunday, but we were in a good place, as Monday we only had to work till we finished the rooms, then we had the rest of the day, and also the Tuesday off. Our bags were already packed on the Saturday, as we were going to Edinburgh by bus, then find a B+B to sleep.
We did not see any B+B's in the central city, so we got onto a bus and asked the kindly driver, who melted under Anna's saucy look and toothy smile, if he could put us down whenever he saw a guest house of any kind. He declared himself very willing to do that, completely bowled over by this pretty woman who looked at him as though he was Adonis himself, and it wasn't long before he stopped and pointed out a B+B to us.The owner was extremely kind, and on Anna asking her if she knew of a nice pub with live music, she promised to look into it for us, and that is how we ended up in a pub on the Royal mile, but not before a amall catastrophe, as usual!

The doors and windows were thrown open wide, and two fans brought from Rosanne's quarters, and it wasn't long before people started drifting back into the pub. For me it was the longest night ever, as I was feeling so bad, and also a bit cross at Anna, who was a strange person when it came to taking responsibility. She had so far refused to do the puds, too scared to make a mistake, so, as also happened in Windsor, it now looked as if she would depend on me to carry her. She had suggested that once she was more at ease, she would start doing puds, but now after my mishap, and me so stressed up and the old confidence low, she refused to help me out. I was really angry, as it was not only my job, and I expected her to bring her side!
The next night was Friday and Emma told me that as they were very busy, I had to also take the puds into the bar, and to the tables. I bally shaked like a blamange as in my minds eye I saw how I drop a plate of hot sticky toffee, or butterscotch into someones lap, and I told Emma that no, after the previous night, I had no confidence. She just laughed, and told me to get on with it, so I did, and miraculously deposited the first lot neatly in front of the diners! After that my confidence grew, and by the end of the night I was oh so, blasè, balancing plates on my arm, just like a real pro!
There was a lot of nice men in the bar, and I got the bright notion as how to get Anna to also take some of the responsibility, and as I got a few stares from a table with five single men to who I had to take  puds, I told Anna in colour how they ogled me, and that I was sure that by the end of the night I would have a man to entertain me.That was like putting a match to a bundle of dried brush, as she perked up on the instant, suddenly smiling her toothy smile, and told me that I can do the puds, and she will take them in! Fat hope! I told her to go fly away, as we can take it in turns like we should have done from the start, and then and there the toothy smile disappeared, and her face became hard and unfriendly, just like a bally spoiled teenager!
We were all done by about eleven, meals only being served till nine, but as we had to clear up after Alex and Rosanne, who I must say, packed away most of the stuff, we were really tired. Anna looked like something from another planet with her wild hair and streaky make-up, and she was ready to head for the room, where she had a bottle of red that she bought from the village shop, but when Joe came in and invited us for a wine, she became very animated, and seeing Joe's amused look when his eyes alighted on her head and face, she bolted for the room where hasty repairs were made. I don't think she could imagine how strange she looked, and almost cried when she saw herself in the mirror! But within fifteen minutes we were on our way down, her make-up redone, and two false nails hastily stuck on. Her hair she tamed with half a cannister of hairspray! We had a lovely time, as the people were so nice, and of course typical Scottish, plyed us with glass upon glass of drinks. Anna, who could not afford whiskey, replied to any enquiry about what she wanted to drink, that she would love another whiskey! The top photo shows the grumpy chef, Alex, and the bottom one me and Jane, a lady who made the most beautiful leather  sporrans, the little purse worn with a kilt.

Poor Anna was very distressed about her two nails that were lost, but as she brought a spare set, she sat for ages to fix the damage, and it was late before she at last put the light out. Of course she never gave another thought to the fact that we had to work at ten, and I had my work cut out to get her out of bed. We were both very tired still from the previous day, as it was a lot for two women who had it quite easy so far! But we got through it all, racing against time, but still having a lot of fun, as we couldn't wait to hit our pillows. I thought I would never be able to get up ever again, but when the alarm went off, I managed it, albeit a bitty stiff legged and and a slight back ache! Anna again proved a hard nut to crack, but as I reminded her, she had nowhere to go in case they fired us, she reluctantly lifted herself out of bed to begin her hour long ablutions.
It was the same again, Anna drifting regally down the stairway, people gaping at this 'royalty' in this small little inn, but she was very happy with the result, and smiled seductively at all the men, before disappearing into the washing-up corner!
It was not long before Anna gave a dispairing little cry, and I ran from where I was doing a few puds to see what was up! The two nails that took hours fixing, had come off within minutes after she started the washing up. I was almost clobbered when I suggested she took the whole lot off for the duration of our stay.
But that was a bally disastrous night for me! As Emma had stressed that the microwave in the office was not ever used for anything but the puds, and that the temperature was set at just the right strength, I never bothered checking, and I put three brownies in, turn the timer accordingly, and ran to get the strawberries ready for the other pud. I was halfway through this when a strange, kind of burning sugar smell drifted into the kitchen, and my tummy summersalted, and my heart plunged right down to my shoes, and I legged it to the office. A thick black cloud of smoke was playfully storming out of the office, and down the corridor to the pub, that being next to the office. I tried to get into the office, with no avail, just coughed and inhaled a lot of smoke. Anna scared me almost to death when she suddenly appeared from behind the smoke curtain, her hair so wild it looked like she had an electric shock! Within seconds Joe, Rosanne and her hubby Ged, and Alex were on the scene, and there I stood, knowing that it would be me that was gonna be fired, and with my nose running, eyes streaming, and coughing fit to be treated for tb, I tried to explain.
I could hear the people in the pub coughing, and Emma came in to say that a lot of would be diners were leaving! I cried like a baby with bad colic!
I did not know who used the microwave, and altered the settings, but when Joe asked me that, I saw Alex, who up to now stood very innocently watching this episode, silently disappear into the kitchen, and I knew it was him, but did not say it out loud!
Rosanne was also a chef, and worked with Alex over the week-ends, which we found a killer, as there was an almighty lot of washing-up!

We slept the whole afternoon, and I felt a little better when my alarm went off, but groaned when it struck me that we now had to go down and do some more work. Anna was not letting up on her coiffure and make-up, and looked like the Queen herself when at last she pronounced herself ready for her shift! As we came down the wide stairs, people who could see us were captivated by Anna, who, head held high and back as stiff as a ramrod, sort of drifted slowly and leisurely downwards! I could actually hear the intake of breaths, and knew it was not for me, as Anna was magnificent!
What she expected our duties would be I do not know, but as she was used to be her own hostess in her restaurant that went bankrupt, I suppose she thought she would be the hostess here as well.
My heart actually broke for her when we were shown to the kitchen by Emma, who told us that we were responsible for the washing-up and the puds. The consternation, disgust, incredulity, and amazement that showed in that face is something that would stay with me for ever, and when I thought of the care she took to look her best, I cried silently. However, I was amazed that, after we had to do the rooms, she could believe that we would be doing the owner's jobs!
Emma, who were one of the barmaids, showed us how to do the puds, and stressed that the microwave in the office was only used to heat the hot puds, and no-one else ever touched it!
The dishwasher that towered over everything was ancient, and as neither Liz that morning, neither Emma that night said anything about using it, we deduced that we had to wash everything by hand. It was one almost impossible job, as the mountains of stuff that came back kept us busy full time, and inbetween this we had to do the puds also. They had on the menu that night, the hotel's own 'Ill Padroni' a concoction of first some chocolate sauce, thick and creamy,  then a warmed browny, then some more chocolate sauce, then vanilla ice cream, and then it was decorated with little squirts of cream from an aerosol tin,  also a very sweet butterscotch, fresh strawberries and cream, and the rest I can't remember!
Poor Anna, who looked so good coming down was looking, after only half an hour, like somebody you frighten the kiddies with, as her hair, so beautifully done earlier, gave up trying to look highly coiffed, and was curling wildly around her face. Her face was a mess, as the heat in the kitchen had melted the base, and that, pulling the rouge with, was running down her cheeks!
There was no time to try and fix it, as Alex, the chef, and a man without any patience, kept on screaming for plates, and we were like two tin soldiers that were winded up too stiffly, me running around trying my best to make the puds at least look edible. As usual I had to take responsibility, and Anna flatly refused to do the puds on that first night.
Anna was in dispair when we finished, we actually had to wash the bally kitchen floor as well while the chef watched us with a huge smile. She of course immediately saw him as a possible conquest, and, not knowing that she actually looked like a bally scarecrow, started cajoling and making up to him in her making up voice and her sexy body language. I could see that he was not impressed, but to tell Anna that was to ask for the wrath of hell to come down upon me! But a few minutes after entering our room there was such a cry of dispair that I jumped a metre high, too find out after calming down a bit, that two of Anna's acrylic nails were lost!
I had a letter from Trienkie, stating that she was enjoying England so much, she feels like applying to stay longer, but I was now beginning, after many years of bringing up kids, to be my own person again, even if I had to wash dishes, and vowed that I will try not to be intmidated by thar empty house anymore!

We were welcomed by half the Strathyre people, most of whom I thought only came to see what the two South Africans looked like, and within a short while my head was spinning from trying to remember names and faces going with the names, and the umpteen glasses of wine that was put in front of us did not help at all. I pushed most of this over to Anna, who simply loved her red, and although I also like it, but in much smaller doses, I just did not have the capacity to hold the amount that she could down.
In no time at all I was as drunk as a bally skunk, but if I was that drunk, I reasoned, how did Anna managed to be still upright? Luckily almost everybody was slurring a bit, and after all the guests have left and the thick curtains were drawn, the locals came into their own. Joe put some music on, and it wasn't long before both Anna and self were 'gliding?' across the floor and between the chairs, both in the arms of two of the men, names long forgotten because of our intoxication! But it was fun, as everybody joined in, and it was four in the morning when we were shown to our room. We fell into our beds without even brushing our teeth, and I woke up with a mouth that tasted like a bally dog had made a poo in it, and a head that felt as if it was cracked wide open.
I had a quick shower before waking Anna, as she would monopolize the bathroom for hours to repair the damage of the previous night! After I had given my teeth a second good and long brush, I felt ready to get on with life again, if only my head would stop aching!
Had one heck of a job getting Anna up, this lady lying with mouth wide open, snoring fit to wake the dead! As we had to meet Liz, the lady doing the rooms and bar at ten so she could show us our duties, it was imperative for Anna to wake up and get dressed. I knew that she must be feeling terrible, and felt a little bit responsible for giving her most of my wine, but darn it, if I knew when to stop because we had to work in the morning, well, so could she! I used to do a lot of breakfasts on my own in Windsor after Anna had been out, or finished a bottle of red on her own, but now we had bosses that we had to please, and could not afford to be absent on our first day!
Gosh but she looked a fright! Her make-up were smeared, her eyes were bloodshot, and her hair was curling wildly around her face. She tried to get out of working, but I convinced her that if she stayed away, it would be the end of our stay in Strathyre, so she got up, moaning and groaning and clutching her head, but she at least went for a shower. By ten she looked almost presentable, her hair having been tamed with her electric curlers, and her make-up put on nice and thick, and moaning about our sore heads, we slowly went downstairs, scared to go to fast in case our headaches, which we calmed with a handfull of panado's flared up again! Liz, a gray-haired lady a bit older than us was waiting, and took us directly to the diningroom, where breakfast had just finished. We had to clear up the tables and then reset all, then we had to wash up the dishes and stuff, vacuum everything, kitchen included, clean up the mess in the kitchen, then go up to the rooms to clean them!I opted to do the washing up, thinking of Anna's false nails, while she did the vacuuming, but she looked terrible, and every time she started shoving the huge thing across the floor, a fit of nausea would make her retch, going as pale as a sheet! It was hell! I quickly finished the dishes and went to help her, but I was not doing much better, me of course not used to the amount of drink I swallowed the night before.
At last we were ready to go up to the rooms, where, after Liz showed us how she wanted things done, I did most of the work, my poor friend just was not capable! She sat on the chairs in the rooms pulling off the pillowcases while I stripped the beds, whereafter she put clean cases on, and I made the beds. I felt like having been to hell and back when at last we finished, and we made a bee-hive for our beds, as we had to be in the kitchen at six for the evening shift! I think we snored so loudly as to be heard for miles around!

We were up early the next morning, bustling around furiously to get ready for our trip to Scotland. As the road ran downhill from the house, we decided to walk, saving the money a taxi would cost us, and we were quite pooped by the time we got to the station.

Anna was tight lipped and quiet, as she was still very cross about the previous night, so on the train to London I just sat reading, trying to ignore the dirty looks she threw my way! But once on Kings Cross station, she started to thaw, and as we had to communicate about where to go, she even started talking to me, and it wasn't too long before she looked quite her old happy self, and we had a nice time waiting on our train, walking around, she doing what she loved most, ogling every handsome man, me also noticing them, but more interested in the other sights! Not that my libido wasn't revved up by a sexy guy or two!
Ten minutes to twelve we were reclining on our allotted seats, and Anna was very happy to inform me that a youngish guy a bit further up the isle was ogling her! I was thankfull, as she got bored easily, and on such a long trip it would be hard on her without a little flirtation!
We decided to treat ourselves by having lunch in the dining car, but a good look at the prices sent us back speedily, leaving a baffled waiter to stare after us, maybe wondering what he had done wrong! We settled on buying a sandwich and coffee from the small food wagon that came around regularly.
I could see that Anna was getting uncomfortable, and wondered at this, as her beau down the isle were still there, but on closer inspection I found that he was staring at her with a strange expression in his eyes, and it scared me. When he saw me watching him he stared at me for a long time, his face expressionless, but his eyes scary! The guy then, after noticing me, started staring at me too, his eyes fixed on my face, then back to Anna.
I told her that I was scared, as I needed the toilet, but the moment I got up, this man started getting up, and then Anna got up, and he again made as if to rise, but sat down as we sat down. We decided to stay put, ignore the stares, and hope that he got off soon. We both exhaled loudly when he got off at York , and with a last look at us through the window, disappeared amongst the crowds. If ever I encountered a bally pervert, I think that was one!
After about five hours the Great Western Flyer deposited us at Stirling station where Joe would meet us. We had a few unsettling moments when we got off the train, and no Joe in sight, and we were just starting to really worry, when we saw him come over the pathway leading over the rails. Phew!
After giving us both a hearty hug, we proceeded to the parking lot, where Anna quickly got into the front passenger seat, and immediately started charming Joe with her sexy, fruity voice! Oh, she was a hussy!
It was a beautiful road to Strathyre, the village that was to be our home for a few months, with patches of daffodils dancing happily in the breeze, lining the road as far as we went. The trees had just started putting on their summer clothes, and the different shades of soft grrens were a delight to my eyes. Anna was so busy impressing Joe that she never even noticed the daffodils. as I found out later that night, but she stopped suddenly when the most awfull stench invaded the cosy car! I was wondering whether it was Joe or Anna who made the stinky, and poor Anna, maybe worried that Joe would think she was the culprit, looked to me with huge terrified eyes, asking me silently if it was me!
But Joe was unconcerned, and when he did notice our dilemma, he laughed and said that there was a pig farm just off the road, and after a good rain and then sunshine, it always smelled like that. The relieve on Anna's face was just so funny, making me laugh out loud!The photos show Strathyre's village shop with the Ben Sheann hotel across the road, and Anna and Joe on our arrival in Strathyre.

The day before our departure for Scotland Anna told me that the owner of the pub where we used to hang out, and she still did, had invited us for a free meal and a drink to say goodbye, and to thank us for our custom! A free meal at this stage was very welcome, and Anna was doing the get ready thing, faffing with her hair, her nails and her make-up until I wanted to scream, but just before seven we arrived at the pub, Anna of course dressed to kill, me looking quite nice, but a little drab against the splendour of her leather pants and sexy shiny black top, showing a lot of clevage, while myself, not blessed with such clevage, was  modestly buttoned up!
The owner himself brought us a red wine each, a large one, and said we could order whatever we wanted! The food was very good, and we had the full monty, sticky toffee pud with ice cream included, and I felt a wee bitty nauseous afterwards, my tummy not quite up to so much food, as the starter, I took fried brie in a filo blanket, was quite filling.
One of the men that Anna got to know, came over and asked if he could join us and buy us a drink, and immediately Anna perked up, almost like she had turned a knob that lit up her face. I have long ago came to accept the fact that Anna just was not able to function without a male to make up to, so I agreed for this man to join us.
He was actually very nice, and we fell into a serious conversation about South Africa, him very interested in everything happening there, and as he knew a lot about Scotland, I was much impressed, and asked him a lot of questions. Anna got heartily bored, and tried without succes to send  the conversation into a sexual discussion, but this man just smiled at her before resuming his converse with me. Later Anna was almost on his lap, and as the evening wore on, she became more and more unhappy, her voice became lower and sexier, telling the guy what a prizzy old thing I was, and that she called me the old Mother Superior behind my back.
The red wine that was sent from all over the pub had its effect on me, making me quite flirtatious and laughing a lot, but poor Anna got drunker and drunker, and more morose by the minute. I felt sorry for her, as it seemed that she had put her heart on this man, and although quite a few of the others came over for a talk and to wish us a happy stay in Scotland, not one of them kept her interest for long, as her attention was on me and her preferred male!
When at last it was time to go, as the pub was closing, the erring bloke walked out with us, and Anna, now very drunk, threw all her scruples to the wind, and told him that if he took her home, he would have a night he would never forget! I was horrified, although I was also quite drunk and feeling reckless, but the guy, who had so far not made any sexual overtures to me, said, looking at Anna: "I don't want you! Its the Mother Superior I want to shag!" I was shocked into hyperventilating quite badly, as I never had any reason to think that he had such thoughts, but he winked at me and smiled, and I knew that he was only trying to get rid of Anna!
Anna was furious, and throwing me a look loaded with hatred, she turned on her heels, and sobbing noisily, she walked down the road, me, after saying a hasty goodbye to my friend, following closely behind, watching her high heeled boots clop-clopping on the cobbles! Back at the guest house I was left to deal with the owner, and I handed her the money which I had kept untill now, and this old witch just counted out what we would have made with her arrangement of the rooms, keeping all the extra money we made! I was furious, and slammed the door behind me so viciously that the whole house shook, but poor Anna was in a state of shock because I don't think she could believe that any man would prefer me instead of her sexy self, and would not listen when I told her!

The irate owner told us that as she was now back and in command, we had to leave, so we told her that as we still had a week to go, and it not being our fault that she came back, I will keep all the money that we made so as to pay for lodgings before we went to Scotland. She went pale, then red, and I think she was as near to spitting me in the eye as she ever was to spitting someone in the eye, as she knew that I had her nicely in the bag, the money still in my bank account. I had kept the books diligently, but when I wanted to go over everything with the woman, she told me shortly that she was not interested in my bookkeeping, but I had just to give her all the money, and she would then devide it. Anna and myself talked it over, but we could nor trust her, and was afraid that as soon as she had the money, she would chuck us out! So I told her that I could not find my bank in Windsor, and she threw another tremendous tantrum, but later excepted it, as there really was no HSBC to be found!
As we had no word from Joe yet, him being still away from home, we decided to go for an interview for another job for Anna, and I would go on to Chipping if neccessary. This job was in Chichester, and early the next morning we were in Slough, waiting for our train. At the designated time a train came in, and we not too sure if it was the right train, I got on quickly to ask the passengers, as there was no-one else around. I was just in when the doors closed, and the bally train started moving. I tried to open the doors, but they were firmly closed, and the last I saw on looking back was a forlorn looking Anna waving and looking after the train with huge black eyes full of panic. I sat back on an empty seat, but before I could get to my cell phone, Anna phoned, quite hysterical, but she calmed down when I said I would get off at the next station, and try and come back.
A moment later my phone rang again, and Anna informed me that it was actually myself that was on the wrong train. There were two trains, of which the milktrain as they called it, stopped at every station, and took hours to reach Chichester. She was now on the fast train, and as it only stop at the main stations, she would be in Chichester long before me. Luckily we haven't got to the first station, as the fast train did not stop there, and by the time we got to its first stop, it would already have dropped Anna at Chichester! Almost! So I sat it out, watching the landscape scenery pass by oh, so slowly, and about three hours after Anna, I got down at Chichester! We took a bus to the inn where Anna had an appointment, and of course, we being two bally ninnyhammers, we got onto the wrong train again, and this thing took us at breakneck speed all across the country, miles and miles away from Windsor. We simply got onto the first train that went the right direction, and did not notice that the line made a split a few kilometres on. The conductor was sweet, and Anna at her best can charm a bally snake from its hole, and he gave us notes to get on the right train when we got off this one, as it also only stop at the main stations. We stormed into King Cross station in the early hours of the morning, after having travelled all night! But as soon as we were on the train to Slough, we got a message from Joe, giving us the news that we could come and work! We were ecstatic!

All too soon we were almost at the end of our Windsor adventure, and we started taking bookings from the next week onwards for the original setting of the rooms, meaning to change it back two days before the owner arrived back. But before we could do anything of that, the owner arrived out of the blue, frightening us into speechless surprise! I think her son, a miserable, longfaced little wannabe Goth had phoned her after coming to fetch some of his books, and saw what we did, because we heard him peep into all the rooms upstairs! I know that we had no permission to change the rooms, but as we had taken more than twice the amount we would have made with the original way, we thought that she would have been very glad with the extra money! And anyway, we had done all the work, we bemoaned our situation when she at long last stopped her nagging and went to her room, that was mercifully not booked up for the night! Sometimes the gods play along, because if she had no room for herself I think she would have murdered us both.
After a while the owner came back, oh so stiff lipped, and told us that the rooms had to be changed back immediately! We were in uproar, as everything was booked up for the next few days, and I had already phoned the tourist office to cancel the booking for the owner's room, and that was sorted out, as they had another place for them. I was aghast, as we had three very cultured and gentle German ladies in the three-bed, and I begged her to let them stay out their time, but she was like a bally silent rock, just stared me out of countenance, then told me to do it pronto!
I knew it was useless to reason with this person, so, with her breathing in my neck, standing behind me scowling and mumbling loudly, I told the ladies that they would have to leave! Their English not very good, they were horrified, as they thought that they had to leave because the owner thought they were lesbian! 'No, no! No lesbian! No lesbian!', they desperately tried to make us see reason, and my heart went out to them. The owner was unmoved and with the mischief done, she then left us, a satanic bally smile on her face, and I had the job to try and console the women, and promised to get them other accomodation, but I had my work cut out to convince them that we were overbooked, as the real reason was so silly, and that their having to leave had nothing to do with being lesbian.
I phoned the tourist office, but they had nothing on their books, so, with Anna staying with the ladies to see that the mad owner did not throw them out onto the street, I ran the streets of Windsor. It was hot, and the streets were steep, and after a long time, and begging countless guest houses to try and help the ladies, I found them a room, actually not far from us in Princess street, just around the corner and up about four blocks. By now I was really tired, but felt happy and looking forward to tell my three worried ladies that I found them an even better room!
As it was not to far, Anna and myself took it upon us to take the luggage to the new place, but I must say, after the running earlier, my legs felt like two jelly sticks, shivering and aching by the time we had lugged the heavy cases up the road.
The ladies were ecsatic, as the new room was twice as big as the other one, and beautifully decorated! As I still had the money we made in my possesion, I paid the deposit for the new room out of that, and to heck with the mad owner, who said that we had to pay it out of our pockets!

The weeks flew by, and as Anna had no job to go to after this, she kept on begging me to go to Scotland and try and get a job there. I was not averse to that, and as I could postpone my painting job for a few months, I said ok, get us a job and I will go with. Anna started buying every paper and magazine that advertized jobs, and sat for hours perusing every add in all of them, pulling nervously on her cigarette while I steamed, as it was a smoke free guest house. But Anna  had never obeyed one of the house rules anyway, and although I was upset at the smoking, I felt sorry for her, as  she had really set her heart on Scotland.
And that is why we found ourselves on the train to Kings Cross in London, Dressed up very smartly, Me in a sedate little outfit from Marks and Spencer, bought at a charity shop for the occasion, Anna dressed up in her leather pants and small black top! She had found this job for two in 'The Lady", and after some heavy pleading and cajoling, she had convinced Joe, the co-owner of an inn in Scotland, that he actually wanted to interview us, and as he had to be on King Cross they made an appointment for him to interview us there. We cleaned the rooms in record time, and then legged it to the station so as to be in time, as we had to be back at three for our guests to book in.
Anna of course was her own flighty self, showing a lot more teeth than was neccessary, talking seductively in her rather hoarse, low and fruity voice, while I sat with a tightly closed mouth, not saying a bally word, as Joe kept on looking at my mouth and smiling! I was sure that half a rasher of bacon was sticking between my front teeth, so, not to jeopardise our job any further, I shut my mouth and kept it shut, just shaking my head when talked to. I must have looked a bally big imbecile, but as this man's eyes kept turning to my mouth, I had no time to try and get the stuff, whatever it was, out.
It was a nightmare interview for me, while Anna of course enjoyed herself tremendously. Joe was a dark, not too tall, but very handsome man of about our own age, and she was really turning on the charm, as she was adamant to get the job for us.
When at last Anna stopped talking, Joe looked at me with such a tender smile, and told me that he was sorry if he disconcerted me by looking at my mouth all the time, and I just nodded like a bally fool, but, he said, my mouth looked exactly like his Mother-in Law's!
Anna groaned and giving me an icy look, she said: "of course now we don't have the job!", but Joe smiled at me and said that he loved his mother in law to bits! Phew! At last I could smile and relax my tightly clenched jaws!!
Joe said he had to first consult with his partner, and that he would let us know soon! We were two happy women!

The four young men in the family room had been staying before, and it wasn't long before they came to talk to us every afternoon after work. They were very pleasant, and we had a lot of laughs, but then Anna, who had become quite bored and restless, one night asked them to take her with them to where-ever they went every night after they visited us, and I giggled uncontrolably at the different expressions on this youngsters's faces. It ranged from utter horror to unbelievingness, and the reasons why they couldn't take her that night was so mixed up and incoherent that even I as an outsider couldn't make out head or tail! But Anna was adamant, and after a lot of excuses they capitulated, never having had a chance anyway, and with faces like they just had news of a death in the family, they said yes, ok, they will take her the next night, before they fled like a mouse from a cat. Anna was ecstatic!
The next afternoon at one Anna was already soaking in the only bath in the house, as she couldn't do it after two for fear of the guests arriving and she in their bath! After the bath she scared me to death when she came into the sittingroom with her black, tightly curling hair standing wildly around a spooky white, thickly masqued face! After lounging on the sofa for a while she rinsed off the masque, then put two cucumber slices on her eyes and lay on the couch for another almost hour, before starting to put her hair in electric curlers.
In the meantime I had to book the guests in and make them comfortable, as she was in no fit state to do anything. Then her false nails were pepped up, her body perfumed with 'Moon and Stars', a quite heavy perfume, before she started on the make-up. The base were put on lavishly to hide all the wrinkles, then the eyes were tackled, and a few different blues were skillfully applied before she got hold of the kohl pencil which she used overlavishly to blacken the top and bottoms of her eyelids, and of course then came the mascara, the kind that makes your lashes look longer! Lastly, after scrutinising every bit of her face intently, the rouge were applied with a heavy hand! She looked twenty years older than without all this make-up, but if I dared saying something, she would have attacked me!
I gasped when she pulled a small little top, good for a bally toddler, over her head, and then put on a pair of black jeans that was so small she lay on the sofa to fasten the zip. I have never seen the top, and thought that while I was doing the work, she must have slipped out and bought it. It was a shiny and very revealing affair, and I realised that she was only trying to fit in with the youngsters.
I saw from the kitchen window when the men came back from work, but instead of looking at the house and waving like every night, they almost creeped around the corner, not looking left or right.
Anna was ready at seven, for eight when they would fetch her, and I almost cried at the sight of this fun loving woman who could not believe that she was no teenager anymore, but I also felt sorry for the youngsters who was co-erced into taking this middle-aged woman on a night out!
I was cooking my dinner when I saw a movement outside the family room, and on closer inspection realised that it was the youngsters, but I couldn't make out what they were doing. Anna was sitting bolt upright, waiting, but after I finished eating my dinner, I realised that it was now almost ten minutes past eight. Anna sat waiting! Then it was half past eight, then nine struck, and even Anna who still sat so hopefully waiting, had to accept the fact that her escorts were not coming for her. She was actually still hopefull, and said that as she had never saw them came in, they must be working late! They never came, and I felt so sorry for her that I asked her to go with me to the pub for a drink!
The next morning I looked out to see what the youngsters were doing outside, and laughed at their audacity! They had put a towel over the light, one of those that came on when it picks up movement, and sneaked out under cover of the darkness!
I was sad, as they never came to visit us again, just walked by the window without looking and greeting us, but Anna hated them. I never told her about the towel!

Anna and myself were a bit out of sink for a day or two, as I made such a boo-boo that you just would not believe. After another night at the pub where Anna was again giving the men her come hither look, I told her that she was behaving really badly, and that if she could not live without a man, I surely could. She gave me such a set-down about me being just like a bloody old mother superior, that I told her that in future she was alone on her excursions to this pub, and I pulled myself up stiff and told her that I was leaving. She just gave me a cold look, so I left, and decided to send Irma a txt to tell her that her friend was behaving very badly! My txt read like this: 'I am really upset with Anna's behaviour! I think we must look like two old ageing hoares, as she gave the men this come-hither looks,  so I complained, and she then said  that I could go to a warm place for all she cares,she needs a man around her!' The road back was a bit dark, and I promptly sent this to Anna, instead of to Irma!.I was enjoying a nice cuppa before my bed, when a hysterical Anna burst into the room, demanding for me to take back my words. Of course I had not realised that I made a mistake, and asked her what she meant, at which she went completely mental, and I quickly closed all the doors that lead to the guest rooms, as she was now ready to murder me! She then showed me her phone, and when I saw my message that should have gone to Irma, I hyperventilated! Badly! I tried to explain that I did not say we were two old hoares, just look like it, sitting in this worker's pub that was only frquented by men, night after night! It took some time for her to calm down, and I was really full of remorse, as I could see how this would make her feel! After two days of sulking she forgave me, and I thanked the Lord for that! But I had to first admit to her that I was a bit of a priss! We decided to roam a bit further from the guest house and go to a more upmarket pub!
We were having a roaring trade with the new arrangements, but decided, when the Queen's mother died, to make the bedroom we used also into a guest room. It was actually the owner's room, but she had locked all her belongings into a walk-in cupboard, leaving us the cupboards in the room. We decided to sleep in the sittingroom that had two huge sofas. Within minutes of me informing the tourist office that we now had an extra twin room, we were booked up.
But we had forgotten one very important aspect, and that was the morning pee. We had decided to go to one of the small cafe's for a coffee before bedtime, and then use their toilet before going home and to bed, and as the guests don't book in before three usually, we could shower and use the room toilets.
So, the first morning Anna, who finished almost a whole bottle of red the previous night, had a bladder fit to burst, and nowhere to go!As I had a glass as well, and a tea, I was also in dire need!It is amazing how need can make 'geniusses' of some of us, as Anna, who could not help me preparing for breakfast and was sitting stiffly on a chair with a pinched face and clenched hands, suddenly jumped up, informing me that she had a brilliant plan! This plan was indeed brilliant under the circumstances, as we would use the floor washing pail and as the closet for all the cleaning up things was huge, one of us had to stand guard while the other one disappears into our improvised toilet!
It was a relieve to empty my bursting bladder, and we were questioning our renting out of our room, as nothing close to us were open at seven in the morning.
But then a miracle happened, as four young boys were booked into the family room for six weeks, and when they moved in that night, they asked us if we could make them a take-away sandwich for every morning, as they had to leave at six thirty every day! Phew!!

After Trienkie left for a new job as a travel agent in London, I became a bit lonely at night, as it was only the Lord and Lady, and Benny in the house apart from myself. The parents's flank where they spent there time was in anpther flank of the house, Quite far from me, and Benny had his own quarters in th opposite flank from me, with the result that after I served the dinner my flat that was above the kitchen and gunroom, became as quiet as the grave, and I jumped aboyt two feet at every creak and sound.
The job in Tesco was kind of ok, but after the novelty wore off, I became thoroughly bored.
So I told the Butler that I was leaving, and they were quite upset, as Heather was still working at Tesco at night, and if I left, she would have to quit the job, and she so badly wanted a new car. I felt very bad, but the day I left the Lady came down to greet me, and she made me promise to come back for some more painting when I was ready.
And now I am on my way back to England, as my house was still not a comfy place for me, so I had decided to go back to Chipping. With me was my friend, well my daughter's friend actually, named Anna, a very sexy and oversexed lady of about fifty two. She had a bit of bad luck with her restaurant, and a few men, so as she was desperate to get out of the country for a while, she got us a job in Windsor, where we would be running a bed and breakfast for six weeks while the owner went to South Africa for a long holiday. After the six weeks I would be going on to my painting job, while Anna was going to organise herself a job.
The guesthouse wasn't very big, but quite up market, and we soon settled into the running of the place.
Every morning the tourist Office would phone, and soon we realised that we were losing a lot of custom, and we could double the income, which we were going to share with the owner afterwards, with just a few re-arrangements.
There was an annexe built onto the back of the house, and this annexe had two double beds and about six singles, while upstairs there were two double rooms, and one twin. It was strange to us that ladies traveling without males were always in threes, and always wanted a bedroom with three beds, and we had always to say no at such an enquiry. We also lost a lot of custom as there were regular enquiries for a room with a double, and a single bed, as some people do travel with their kids.
So we sat down and worked out a plan, and in the end decided to take one of the single beds from the annexe, and put it in one of the double rooms, then another one in the twin room, making it a three-bed!It was one hellish job, the iron beds being ancient, and weighed about half a bally ton each, and the staircase narrow and steep, and very soon our knuckles had almost no skin left, and our shins were bleeding and scuffed! But the thought of all that lolly that would find its way into our not too plump pockets, we kept it up, and round about  two we were finished and extremely happy with ourselves, and I informed the tourist office of our new arrangements! The double with the single was immediately booked, and the next day three young girls booked the three-bed. We were thrilled.
From then on we were fully booked almost every night, and congratulated ourselves for our clevernous.
about two weeks after we started, four young gentlemen from some or other firm booked into the family room, that is the annexe for six weeks. At night after everyone was booked in, Anna and myself went to the nearest pub, where I had one wine and then went on the coffee, but this was so bad that it was really undrinkable.
Anna would sit with half closed eyes checking out the talent, her black thickly kohl-lined eyes , itself as pitchblack as could be, glittering with a come-hither look. When I told her that she made us look cheap, she told me that I am a bloody priss, and that she was just trying to get someone to buy her another wine. The thing is, I did not really know this woman, as Irma always sang at her restaurant, but through getting a bitty tipsy after dinner was served, and loving to mingle with the guests, this guests started helping themselves at the bar, and I have seen how some just pour and go, without paying. So she went bankrupt which was a pity, as she was a fabulous cook and the restaurant amazing.
But she was one funny woman. About two weeks before we left for England, she phoned to tell me that she met this man, and that he was amazing, and that he had this amazing friend, just right for me! Ignoring my remonstrations, she arrived with this specimens, not badlooking, but I immediately felt uncomfortable. The one she brought for me cornered me on Irma's veranda, and started preaching to me, and within ten minutes I felt like the biggest sinner ever, and my ears were starting to get very warm indeed.
They left after a cuppa, as they stated that they were such godly like specimens, alcohol do not pass their lips. Anna phoned later singing their praise, and told me that her beau was a debt collecter, and he was going to get all the money people owned her from them. She got furious when I told her that they are not to be trusted, but being Anna, who I knew could not face life without a man, she said a short goodbye.
A few days later she came to visit, looking like the dogs had taken her bone away, and told me that this guy had indeed collected the money, but had now disappeared. I felt it was not the right time to tell her :told you so!' So I was a bit apprehensive of Anna's dealings with the male species!

I went for an interview at Tesco, and got myself a job from two in the afternoon till five, and was very excited! At home the till ladies were all people without a formal tertiary education, and I would not even think of applying for such a job, as I simply would not get it. First we did some training, there were two of us, and before long I was sitting behind a till! I enjoyed it thorougly, as people asked me where I came from, and I struck up a lot of conversations, and was also asked to tea by a few women.
Everything at the big house was being scrubbed and polished, and I was asked to help, as it was the old Lord's birthday, and they were having a lot of houseguests for the week-end. But three days before the guests would arrive, disaster struck, in the guise of thousands of flies that suddenly took over the house! Heather and Pat, the housekeeper tried every insect killer on the market, and I was sent up and down to the village to see what else the chemist recommended, but as fast as we killed the lot, another lot hatched, and stormed the house. The Lady was a wreck, as everything was planned so meticulously, but then one of the household suggested netting before the windows. It sounded a good plan to me, and Heather skidded away in the staff car to see if she could find any in Chipping. She stayed away for ages, and came back now also a nervous wreck, as she had to go to another village for the stuff. It was now only the afternoon and the next day before all this nobles would arrive, and the house had about a hundred bally windows to cover, so all had to jump in, measure, cut, and then I, being the only one tall enough to reach the upper windows, had to fasten the netting with duimspykers. [upholstery nails] I was terrified, as the ladder was far to short, and I had to cling for dear life to anything that would keep me from dropping like a stone, and positioning and fastening the stuff was one nightmare. We worked till the early morning hours, but was not even half way, but my poor back was breaking and my knees were so warm and tired they refused to go up the ladder one more step. Early next morning we were at it again, and by nightfall all the windows were covered, and the whole of the staff jumped in to help clear away the dead flies that were in every nook and cranny. Phew!I could hardly move my legs were so tired, so I had a meal and went to bed! Thomas phoned Tesco to explain why I could not get to work for three days! (kind of upholstery nails)
The guests were wonderful! It is strange that this people with all the money and being so high born, were all so fine with this phenomena, and hardly lifted an eyebrow, while some of the staff were so rilling and grilling (put off and making a scene) fit to make me want to smack them. The party, the flies knocking persistently on every window without any success, did not disrupt anything, and all were happy and gay!
The photo's are of me in my Tesco working suit, and in the staff car that I could use.

Trienkie went away for ten days on her Kontiki tour, and then the Lady asked me if I would mind staying alone at the house for five days, as they were going to a wedding, and the butler, who always look after the place when they went away, was off tho Wales to see his children. I thought about the dark and mysterious rooms in the older part, and the circular stairs that only had one very faint light, and my pants started shivering, but, I reasoned, I won't have to go in there, so it shouldn't scare me at all.
Mmm! After I had promised to water the plants, keep the doggies with me in my room, and at night just put the alarm on, I relaxed, as that did not sound that bad at all! What I did not know, was that the alarm was on the top floor in the second oldest part of this enormous house that was built in three different and far apart centuries, and hid a lot of secrets! So, the butler explained to me, I had to go up the main staircase, a wide, woodflanked and quite showy affair, the walls hung with this paintings of austere old men who glared angrily if you passed them, putting off the lights as far as I went, then I would come to the part where the alarm was situated, and then, he stressed, I had to put the alarm on, and there was just enough time to run for the door to the circular stairs and closing it. Ans this door I could only reach by running through the oldest and scariest part! Almost had a bally heart failure! Thomas assured me that there was no ghosts running loose, but I did not believe it, and it was with sinking spirits and an aweful feeling of loneliness that I saw his car disappear through the gate.It was hell! The first night I had to run back and forth about five times after putting on the alarm, to put it off again as it was now so dark with only one faint light to show me the way to the corridor through which I had to run, that I got cold feet when I saw the dark passage that I had to conquer.! I was too faint hearted to run through that spooky corridor and just the thought of that ill lit spiral stairs with the holes where the Christians were hid, was enough to give me the jitters. The second night was no better, and it was with a heart pounding fit to jump out of my throat that I got to my flat and the five doggies that were fighting and bitching as they all wanted to sleep with their heads on my pillow!
On the second day the gamekeeper brought a bunch of pheasants that were quite dead and tied by their legs, and told me that he was hanging it in the empty coal shed to ripen, and please not to forget to tell the cook when she came back. Which I promptly did. The five days of my ordeal did pass, and the spoiled dogs were still all alive, and no crook had come to steal the family jewels, but I was a nervous wreck. The other lot eventually came back, and I was so glad I couldn't stop smiling, and felt suddenly light and calm again. A few days after all was back a stench started hanging like a thick blanket over the back side of the house where the kitchen and also the outbuildings were situated. Everybody was walking around with pinched faces and scrunched up noses, and later the stench was so bad that the butler got somebody in to clean the drains that was situated near to the coal shed, where the stench was pinpointed.
It was when the lorry with all its draincleaning tools pulled up in front of the coal shed that it hit me like a bally bomb! The precious French Pheasants! Needless to say, the pheasants were putrid, and the butler NOT impressed, and the gamekeeper when he heard even less, and the old Lord had to forsake this delicacy! I was now considering a part time job in the afternoons at Tesco, as it cost a lot of money to drive around like I did, and when Heather told me that there were vacancies, I rushed to apply!

I was also becoming the youngest son of my employers's chaufeur, and had to drive him where-ever he wanted to go. As he was born to them when they were quite high in age, specially the old lord, the boy was a little retarded, but quite capable of doing a lot of things for himself. So one Saturday I was asked if I minded taking the young man to the agricultural show, as he went every year, and loved it. It was very strange, this slower boy, with the proud and quite haughty bearing of his dad, a purebred noble. Firstly he wanted to visit a special food tent, where the more gourmet foodies were on sale, and there were plates with samples to taste at every stall. This boy was in ecstasy, and went from stall to stall, and it really made a wonderful if bizarre picture, this noble looking and posh speaking young man, eating away at the samples from one stall until nothing was left on the plates, then he moved on to the next stall, and did the same. I tried to remonstrate with him, as I could see that the stallholders were getting a bit worked up, but just then one of the old Lord's aquaintences spotted us, and told me that the boy did this every year! At last he had gone the whole length of the big tent, explaining loudly the attributes and bad points of every stall, and he was all for starting over, but I noticed that no additional samples were on show, so he lost interest, and dragged me to the animal camps, where he told all who wanted to listen about every breed and its peculiarities and illnesses, and I realised, as he stood talking to some men, that he was not as retarded as people made him out to be, but changed my mind a few moments later.
He got tired of the animals, and said he wanted a burger. On our way to the foodstalls we came upon this small train for kiddies, and he insisted on a ride. Luckily the bloke running it was aquainted with the family, and said it was ok for Bennie to have a ride. But then he insisted on me getting on with him, so the owner said ok, get up, no problem! My charge wanted o sit in the front, and up we went, and the little train, its other passengers between the ages of  three and six, started its course around the grounds with Bennie shouting, laughing and waving at everybody.Some people I think knew him, as they waved back and shouted their hello's, but a lot of them was absolutely shocked into just staring from me to the young man who was enjoying himself immensely!
I was enjoying the farm, and the fruit and veggies that was brought in every morning was just incredible, fresh and wet with dew. As Trienkie and myself was now responsible for dinner if there were no guests, me cooking, and Trienkie serving, I had a ball, as never before did I have such fresh and such a variety of fresh produce. Benny was in the kitchen with us most of the time, and he was quite happy to help us peel veggies and do the washing up. We were always singing and dancing, and he loved it if we made a train by holding on to each other and run around the table, singing at the top of our voices. As all the servants went home at night, and the room where his parents had their dinner were  in another part of the house, and out of earshot, we had a wonderful time with the lad who I think must have been quite bored.
One day I went for a walk and came across this large amount of small graves, and was very sad for all this small babies of this family and their forbears who had died so young. The whole time during my walk I was thinking about this, and when I mentioned it to Heather the cook, she started laughing until her eyes started watering, and I felt quite affronted until she got her composure back, and told me that it was all the family dogs that lay there! Must say, I thought the lot named their babies quite strangely!
The Lady and myself talked a lot while we worked, and I learned a lot about the history of the place, and how a lot of Christians had died under the hands of the Catholics who found them hiding there. Scary!Trienkie was getting bored, had agreed to stay for a while longer to be with me, but I knew she was wanting to go to a new job, as she now knew about how the nobility lived! But before they left, she and her friends were going on a Kontiki tour, and as I was now finished with the old part of the house, and had promised to do the spiral staircase, I decided to stay until they came back, after which she would stay on for another two weeks.

I am now on my way to England to visit my daughter, and see what she was up to, before going on to Denmark to see my son and his family. He had gotten married in the meantime to a  Danish girl called Nina, and they decided to live in her home country, as with the affirmative action the new government was implementing, white youngsters had little chance of employment.
After about eight months in Holland, and being alone on the farm most of the time, I decided that the loneliness did not suit me, so it was wuth quite a sadness for the animals I loved that I quitted!
As the youngsters who go over to England or Europe for two years don't stay at one place to long, wanting to see most of the country, Trienkie was now working as parlourmaid  in a big country house for an old lord and his younger wife in the Cotswolds.
I took a bus to Oxford, and then on to the small village called Chipping Norton, where Trienkie fetched me with the staff car.
The people were all very nice, and I was astonished at how responsible my girl had become. She had to help in the house, take breakfast to the family and guests to their rooms, and serve lunch and dinner dressed up in black and white.
I had a conversation with the lady of the house, and when I told her that I loved painting, and can do colourwashing of walls, she asked if I would not be interested, after my visit in Denmark, to stay for a while and help her with the old part of the house, and also the circular stairs, that needed a new look.

My visit to Denmark was lovely, and although the couple was so young, they were doing fine and was ecstatically happy. They married so young as Jan, my son could then get a job in Denmark. They had bought a house, and I laughed when I saw how Jan mowed the would- be lawn that looked like a young man's first beard, small patches here and there. The baby, Renè was very lovely, and spoiled by all.I had a lovely time, and the time flew by, and before I knew it, I was busy painting, first the Lady asked me to do the breakfast trays before we started on the walls. She was wonderful, did all the finer work like painting the windows and so on. My job was lovely, as I had to work from eight to one, then I could have the staff car if it wasn't needed, with a flat and a small salary thrown in. I suited me for a while, as every day that passed brought a little more peace into my sole, and I realised that I was indeed busy coming to terms that from now on I would be alone!

It wasn't long before I was pulled into the household more and more, specially to help with the five Shi Tsu doggies who was ruling their mistress with an iron fist! One day the Butler asked me whether I knew how to cut a dog's nails, and of course I said, ya, what, no prob! The dog was limping as a result of only one overgrown nail, and I confidently took the task upon me, me having cut a lot of kiddies's nails, and I had a good look, decided on where and how, and snipped! The next moment a thick stream of blood was spouting all over the butler who had to keep her still, an all I could do of course was gasped, while the poor butler had a complete nervous breakdown! He was to take the dog to the vet, but having had too much work, he decided to ask me, and now he had to explain to the Lady what had happened! Luckily she phoned from London to say that they were staying a few days longer in their town house, and by the time they came back, the nail was fine! I enjoyed a lot of the happenings on the farm, but the most hillarious was the Lady calling the butler. She had a very deep voice, and she would call: 'Thomas'!, in this deep throated and quite hoarse voice, and Thomas would rush up and say, very respectfully and in this soft and ladylike voice: 'Yes,melaty?' It was a happy bunch, and the Lady asked me to stay on after the painting, annd see to some of the things that Thomas found too much, like taking the doggies to the parlour, and cooking for the two of them at night, as the cook took an evening job at Tesco to earn extra money for a new car.

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Just after my weekend away, Arina informed me that she was going to Italy with a group of friends to play golf. It was quite lonely on the farm when she was away, but the wild deer gave me a lot of pleasure. There was one youngster who came up to my little cottage a lot, so I started putting out all my fruit and veggie peels for him. He became quite tame, but always stayed just far away from me so as not to be touched. I think he was very lonely, maybe he had been driven from his herd after trying to steal one of the leader's wives, as he was a young male! It was amazing to watch the little stumps on his head grow into a pair of impressive antlers.
One morning before sun up, I walked through the woods to check on the furthest fence that was close to a busy road, as Gerda was picking me up early for a day out, and I was lost in pleasant thoughts about the day when suddenly from almost under my feet there was one big commotion as a lot of biggish beasties started screeching, then took to their heels, warning all the inhabitants in the wood that an invader was out and about. I was bally frightened out of my wits, and when the life came back into my lame body, I legged it back at full speed to my cottage. I would not take a bet on who sceamed the loudest, and sitting there still shivering from fright, a cuppa in my hand, I tried to calm down, and realised that the beasties must have been a family of wild hogs that was rudely disturbed from their morning slumbers! I took a vow never to go into the woods at such an ungodly hour again.
As the trees and shrubs were very dense, it never really lightened up inside the wood, and the road down to the main gate that was flanked with huge trees overhanging and meeting in the middle, was scary, as it was so dark, and I usually pedalled a highly complaining bicycle with vigour when passing through it.I was walking home from the gate one day shortly after this episode, as my bicycle had a puncture, and I was waiting for Herman, Gerda's husband to come and fix it, when Arina's car stopped next to me, and she asked if I wanted a lift.
Next to  her was a youngish man whom she introduced as her son. Both of them sat very quiet and bolt upright, and loud, heavy music was filling the car, and after a lame effort to make conversation, and no response. I also sat with a closed mouth. It was only when we got out of the car at home, and I saw Arina clutching a very ornate urn to her bosom, that I realised that she had gotten her dead husband's ashes that day! This ashes was also put in the entrance hall, surrounded by loads and loads of white lillies, and she had the Bachs and Beethovens on again at full capacity! Gave me the bally shivers, and I was sure there was something menacing emanating from that urn. Later, when I heard the story of how she came to marry this old man, a lot of things made sense, even the fact that I was sure he was casting an evil spell! But she was kind and nice to me, and I had no interest in all the sagas, I just wanted to try and work out my own empty nest problem,. and enjoy life in the meantime!

One of my friends were visiting with her daughter and they invited me over for a week-end. Arina was kind enough to take me to the trainstation in Zwolle, and after about an hour in this monstrously fast train I was at my destination, and Sue, my friend and her daughter Meisie met me at the station. They were delightful to be with, and we went to an open air antique market where I bought a whole bundle of old prints, not at all valuable, but very nice.

On Sunday they were all going to church, and as nobody enlightened me before I came, I had of course only brought leisure clothes, not at all suitable to go into the Lord's house to give praise. Now see, Sue was quite a few years my senior, well, about 22, but she still dressed to kill, and loved her adornments and her make-up. Her dresses or pants suits were always designer stuff, and in my eyes designer stuff are always a bitty flashy. This Sunday will stay in my mind forever as the most painful and uncomfortable day ever, as apparantly this church had a South African Dominie [preacher], and come hell or high water, I had to go and hear him preach, and afterwards meet him. So Sue brought one of her colourful pant suits, with lots of adornments sewed on, and I was told to get dressed. Sue was a friend, but had always treated me like a wayward teenage daughter, so I put the suit on. As she was a big bossomed, small hipped woman, and I was more of a pear shape, the pants with their skinny legs, that looked good on her, looked like a bally stiffly stuffed rag doll on me, while my small upper body was drowning in the top. Sue critically eyed this apparition, then announced that I needed some jewelery, and out came a flashy gem studded string that had to be coiled around my neck, but she was not finished yet, and I was told to take off my smallish silver earrings, and she handed me a pair of huge, also gem studded things and this monsters hung almost on my shoulders, enlarging the holes in my lobes as it was so heavy! Then out came the make-up! Sue wore a lot of rouge and eye shadow, usually green, as she had green eyes, and wore mostly green clothes. By this time I was as meek as a lamb, as none of my remonstrations made a difference, and my sallow cheeks were beautifully reddened, and my eyes were done up heavily in green! I peeped in the mirror and my sole cried. But then I remembered that I had no shoes, only my sneakers, and shuddered at the thought of me all dollied up with a pair of sneakers on my feet. Again Sue just took it in her stride, and disappeared to her room, then came back with a pair of lovely very high heeled shoes, and I was ordered to put in on! It was too small, and I told her so, but, she said, my feet are in, and as I will be sitting all the time, I could take it off if it hurt me. Ha-ha!  Ignoring the many stares I received, some really incredulous, I made it to the pew where we were to sit, and as my feet were aching like the blazes, I took the shoes off immediately! After the long and quite boring service everybody was standing outside in groups, talking, and I hobbled alongside Sue to where the Dominie was holding court with some of his ardent followers. When he heard that I was also from South Africa, he started talking, and as he droned on and on, my feet swelled more and more, until they hung out of the shoes like two over raised unbaked breads! When at long last his attention was seeked by an elder, I was free to go, and could hardly lift my bally feet off the ground, so, to the horror of Sue, I took them off and walked barefoot to the car! She was not impressed, but I couldn't care a fig! The weekend however  was lovely apart from that!

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 I couldn't get hold of Arina, so I had to take the bus to Hattem and walk all the way up to the farm with my sore feet. It took about a week for those two manhandled parts of my body to get back to normal! Next day Arina informed me that she and a few friends were off to Italy for two weeks, and I was given a lot of instructions to follow.

I was by now a lot more fit, as in the beginning the road up to the farm from the small village called Hattem, which was quite steep for Holland had me push the bike half of the way, while ancient ladies in high heels, severe three piece suits, and neat hairdo's passed me, easily and comfortably pushing the pedals with their stockinged and nicely shod feet! Felt a bit silly, as some of them looked to be a hundred if a day! But as time went on, I managed to pedal further and further, until I could make it to the top.
I was also becoming quite blasè about cycling on the main roads, which usually had bicycle paths, and one day I decided to visit Gerda, the guy who fed the animals's wife, near the Ysel river. It was a beautiful day, and I was enjoying the peace and quiet of a sunday morning, when, around a bend in the road, a whole bally army of motorbikes suddenly roared into my view, and I had such a fright, as they were all over the road, and there was no bicycle path that I got flustered, lost my balance, and found myself and bicycle rolling down a steep slope. Most of the bikers stopped, and they were very sorry to have caused me to almost die, and they helped me back up the slope, and I felt like a bally salt pillar I was so embarrassed! After they had made sure that I was unharmed they went on their way, and I sat for a long time to make sure there was no more bikes coming from the harbour, and to lick my wounded pride into a semblance of assurance! I didn't know there was a boat going up and down the Ysel, but now that I do, I will be a lot more careful in future.
Gerda's house was just lovely, with a sunny deck, and a pond that ran almost right around the house, and she had green fingers, as everything grew beautifully, with kikkers [frogs] singing love songs to each other in shrill voices! It was a lovely visit, and all too soon I had to go back. What was so strange to me, is that in South Africa, the moment the sun sinks below the horison, it was dark, and here it stays light almost the whole night. The first night I was on the farm, I sat watching television, but later my eyes became sore, and I felt extremely tired, but would not go to bed when it was still almost daylight! When I eventually looked on the kitchen clock, it was almost four in the morning! I had a letter from Trienkie who was having too good a time in England, or so I thought! She was at the moment working in a pub, and knowing the youngsters who escaped their parents's eyes, and their doings from my time in Greece, I hope that she would be ok!

It was as usual, drama again before I was sitting my bum down in the plane. The Gauguin copy I have been doing was standing outside to dry quicker, and as I went out with my luggage, I saw it, and as the woman had already payed me, I did not want anything to happen to it, so I put my stuff down and carried the painting into the house, went outside again, got in the car, and away we went to the airport. We were a bit late, so I went completely numb as I opened the boot, and it was empty. I asked Irma where my luggage was, and she said that she didn't know, and by this time I was shivering like a bally blamange! We ran to the weighing-inn counter, and explained to the man what was going on, and he said well, most people are already waiting to board, but their was still some time, and he could maybe hold the plain for fifteen minutes at the longest, so Irma flew away like Walt Disney's roadrunner, and I stood biting my nails to the flesh! Luckily we were only about ten kilometres from the airport, and Irma must have driven like a demented racer, as the flight was only kept back about five minutes! I was very, very glad when at last I boarded, and did not even mind the accusing stares of the other passengers! I had to transfer at Johannesburg airport, and thanked the technology that made it possible for my luggage to be forwarded to my end destination!
I had to get the train at Amsterdam to a place called Zwolle, as that is where my new employer would meet me, and took a bus from the airport to the trainstation in Amsterdam, where I was almost flattened within minutes by a bally tram! The things are so silent, and although I was warned to watch out for them, I forgot, and walked ever so stupidly and without looking left or right, and almost expired!  After a bit of worrying I found the right train, and thankfully sat down for the last leg of my journey.
Arina, my new employer was a pretty woman of about forty five, and said she was very glad to see me, as she had a golfing tour with friends to Spain, and her husband was really poorly. As indeed he was! He was in bed when we arrived, and we went up to his room for me to be introduced, and I had a shock, as he was not only looking poorly, he looked to be on his last legs! I could not believe that the woman would go away and leave her husband when he looked to be at death's door, which he was, as he died suddenly, just after she came back from her tour! It was a shock, but Arina asked me to stay on and look after the farm while she went jauntering later. There was a man who came to feed the wild animals every night, as it was a game farm. I had to see that the fences were always intact, and just generally keep an eye. It was the most horrific ten days, just after the old man's death, as he was lying in state, in a glass cask in the entrance hall, and his face was pulled into a horrible grimace, and I had to pass him whenever I had to go into the house! The old Dutch houses creaked a lot, and every time it happened while the man was lying there, I jumped about a metre in the air! On top of all this, Arina played this heavy music as loud as she could, and I saw her having long conversations with him, and I wondered if she was trying to  maybe make up for her neglect, but a friend of his who came to pay his respects said she was ten to one trying to pry information about his estate out of him. Well, I did not want to think badly of her, so I tried not to think about it at all! But all this passed, and as I had the most beautiful cottage in the woods, I was content, by now doing quite well on the bicycle.